A Word Fitly Spoken…

A Word Fitly Spoken…

In Proverbs 25:11, King Solomon says, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

But sometimes we use the wrong word, and the results are a little bit different. For instance, yesterday I received the following e-mail from a friend of mine in ministry, which I thought was hilarious. I hope you do, too.

Here it is:

One Sunday after his sermon, the pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. A lady stood and walked to the podium.

She said, “I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck, and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating, and the doctors didn’t know if they could help him.”

You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced.

“Tom was unable to hold me or the children,” she went on, “and every move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom’s scrotum and wrap wire around it to hold it in place.”

Again, the men in the congregation were unnerved and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.

“Now,” she announced in a quavering voice, “thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital, and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely.”

All the men sighed with relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.

A man stood up, walked slowly to the podium, and said, “Hi, I’m Tom.”

The entire congregation held its breath.

“I just want to tell my wife that the word is ‘sternum’.”

I hope you got a kick out of it.

John Peterson

Bronze Bow Publishing
2600 E. 26th St., Minneapolis, MN 55406
866.724.8200  fax 612.724.8995
Bronze Bow Publishing Copyright © 2009 Bronze Bow Publishing. All Rights Reserved.